SEPARATION ANXIETY: MENTAL WELLNESS TIPS FOR KIDS, PETS AND PARENTS

Going from spending all your time to just a few hours a day together is a big change.

When Scarborough, Ont., mom Cicela Bella Bravatti tells her two kids it will soon be time to head to school or daycare, she hears a familiar refrain about the family’s dog, Luna: “She’ll cry if we go.”

The siblings are obviously sharing their own feelings, Bravatti told HuffPost Canada, as they’ve adored the seven-year-old pet since she came into their lives as a puppy.

“They’re glued to her most of the day, so it’s hard for them to leave. She’s the first one they want to see when they come home,” she said.

Separation anxiety hits hard this month

September is a month of transition for many Canadian families. Kids are heading back to school for the first time since March and a reopening economy has led many parents who were temporarily working from home to return to their physical workplaces, leaving pets on their lonesome for most of the day. But going from spending every waking moment together to being apart for several hours can cause people (and animals!) of all ages to experience separation anxiety.

Dr. Shimi Kang, a Vancouver-based psychiatrist and the author of The Dolphin Parent, said that separation anxiety is part of growing up for kids, but has become a widespread and issue in the pandemic that can impair people’s ability to function, including parents.

“It’s unprecedented for us to spend so much time together,” she explained, as that extra bonding has made physically leaving loved ones that much harder.

Be proactive with your furry friend

Heart-breaking whines and howls from pets are making many Canadians feel guilty about leaving the house.

According to Laura Bye, separation anxiety boils down to basic pet psychology. The Save Our Scruff founder told HuffPost Canada humans are training their pets at all times by what they do or don’t do. When owners make their arrivals and departures a big deal for their pets, they’re putting their animal in a high-energy, playful state that becomes anxiety, when they’re left in an empty home or crate for hours on end.

“The best tip I can say is that about 15 minutes or half an hour before you leave the house, that’s when you start to absolutely ignore them,” Bye said.

For Dog Tales Rescue and Sanctuary handler Cassandra Ferrante, getting pets used to being alone for short periods of time before heading to work can help; even if a pet doesn’t show anxiety, preventing that feeling through gradual periods of separation is key.

Recognize their triggers

Alyssa Williams is a Toronto-based 30-year-old capoeira student who fostered rescue dogs before she got Bruno, a poodle mix, 10 months ago. He was slightly anxious before the pandemic, she noticed, but now whines when he’s left alone and becomes hyper-vigilant outside.

“I wish I could tell Bruno how perfect he is … and that I’ll be home before he’s knows it,” she told HuffPost Canada.

Williams has learned to anticipate what will heighten his anxiety — watching his owner leave or being near other dogs — and is training him to respond in a healthy way.

This training can look like building a healthy routine, one where moderate exercise, crates, and dog trainers can be a part of.

Make your time together matter. Parents who notice that everyone in the house feels anxious about spending more time apart should strive to make what time they do spend together as special as possible. It will help make this transition period easier for everyone ― your kids, your pets and you included!